Knock, knock

by cspellot


They were not expecting anyone so they were all startled when they heard the knock on the door. The whole family was spread all over the living room streaming the movie Saved! on their hyper big flat screen Internet-ready HDTV. Jack got up from the sofa and went to the door. After peering through the peephole, he immediately turned his back to the door and whispered in horror,

- Oh my God! It’s Jesus!

Uncle Jonathan, who was hardly serious about anything, seized the moment,

- Is Mary and Joseph with him?

- Can it, Uncle, I’m serious! It’s Jesus! Everybody please shut it!

He said this forcefully but with a low voice while moving his index finger to his mouth to signal silence. Everybody froze, all eyes on Jack not knowing if he was just being a punk or really serious. Someone instinctively hit the mute button on the remote.

- Knock, knock, knock.

Came in the next few door knocks a little louder. Jack looked through the peephole once again. Jesus was still at the door.

- Holy crap!

He suddenly took his hand to his mouth realizing what he had just said.

- He’s still there!

Now everybody panicked looking at each other in silence nervously wondering what to do next.

- What should we do?

Someone said at last, but no one really knew exactly what. Some said to open the door to him, but others objected that the house was too messy, that it hadn’t been cleaned in two weeks and that it was in no condition to receive an unannounced visit like that. The counter was that Jesus hadn’t come there to see how the house looked; he had come to see them. Everyone started picking up popcorn and Doritos from the carpet.

- KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK.

A little girl said

- I wanna see Jesus!

Everybody picked up the pace cleaning around. Somebody said

- Forget the popcorn, just open the darn door!

Someone shot back

- No! Not yet! Look at this place. He won’t like it.

Uncle Jonathan was unfazed.

- I think I heard a donkey out there. Don’t let that animal in here. We won’t be able to take him out once we let ‘im in.

All at once and loud

- Uncle!

After scrambling to get the place together they all felt somewhat comfortable about letting Jesus come in. The all agreed it wasn’t in good taste to let the TV on. No one wanted Jesus to see the movie Saved! after all.

Jack went back to the door, grabbed the doorknob and was about to turn it when he decided to take another peep

- He’s gone!

Someone, looking heavenward, said relieved

- Thank God!